Saturday, April 5, 2008

Non-Consent Towing Column Takes The Prize

Further proof towing utopia has tapped a deep vein of discontent over issues of abusive non-consent towing practices:

I just returned from the Minnesota Daily Alumni Awards Banquet, and one of my columns tied for first place as "column of the year." Of all the many things I write about--from bike theft to the I-35W bridge disaster to the need for security cameras on campus--which column won the prize?

"Towing vehicles is not the answer." (Click on title for a link)

(I also picked up columnist of the year, which was a nice finale to my career as a college newspaper columnist, but I "give all the credit to the issues.")

I was kind of hoping to say a few words and plug this blog, but they weren't having the prize winners give speeches, which was fine by me. The keynote speaker was sitting at my table, right next to my little son, but I didn't realize it until he took the podium to speak. It was Jim Ragsdale, who writes all the editorials for the Pioneer Press (this is not a joke, in light of severe cuts at the publication) plus opinion columns.

Jim Ragsdale kept the audience interested and sometimes in stitches with his stories, a couple of which I'm going to print right here. Even though the stories are about former governor Jesse Ventura and have nothing to do with towing, these are golden, exclusive anecdotal nuggets which I see it as my sacred duty to preserve on promulgate...since my search of the internet has led me to believe this stuff has never been published. (If it has been, I'll have to go back and revise this claim)

Towing Utopia exclusive scuttlebutt, rumor and dark innuendo:

(Courtesy of Jim Ragsdale's public remarks at the Minnesota Daily Alumni Banquet)

Governor Ventura and the new monument

When Ventura was governor, he was out driving one day in the "executive Navigator" and saw some construction taking place not so far from the state capitol. He asked an assistant what, exactly, was being built. The assistant didn't know, but promised she'd find out.

The next time Ventura was out driving with the assistant, they happened by the construction and Ventura asked about it again.

"Oh, yes," the assistant said. "I did look into that, and it turns out they're building the Women's Suffrage Monument."

Ventura put his lips in a tight, thoughtful line.

"Women suffer," he muttered.

Governor Ventura's bit of Cuban diplomacy

Ventura was always wearing what Jim Ragsdale called "found clothing." It was often some shirt from a business he had recently visited, and he'd be wearing that shirt for a few days, sometimes,or so it seemed.

During his administration, Ventura made a trip to Cuba to do his bit for diplomacy, saying it was a shame the United States had an embargo, and how he didn't approve and would prefer to do business with Cuba.

While out and about in the Communist nation, with little regard for appearances, Ventura was spotted wearing the following t-shirt:

NAVY SEALS: When it absolutely, positively has to be blown up overnight.

No comments: